Couples Therapy

Are you longing for love and connection with your partner? Have you become tired of not feeling on the same page with your partner?

Disconnection, hurt, conflict have become your normal, and one or both of you are feeling:

like you’re engaging in repeated cyclical arguments without resolution

  • lonely and like you’re the only one trying to make the relationship better

  • feeling more like roommates then partners

  • anxious and like you’re walking on eggshells, afraid to say anything that may lead to another argument

  • worried daily about the future of your relationship

  • hopeless, like you’ve tried everything but things only seem to get worse and now your exhausted

  • unwanted because you’ve grown distant, and you’re deprived of affection, intimacy, and/or sex

There are days where everything feels like a “good day” and then comes miscommunication and you both end up arguing over how it was said or what was said until you both feel exhausted and just walk away from the conversation never to return but left with the confusion of how did we get here, we used to be happy.

 

Your partner once felt like a best friend, one you could tell anything to at any time or anywhere. But now you fear being vulnerable and often refuse to say anything about what is causing you pain. Or at times you take the risk, share how you are feeling only to be dismissed or overlooked through defensive or sarcastic conversations. So today you often avoid all means of vulnerability, and this lack of trust is causing you to grow further apart.

 

Maybe its communication that is the biggest issue in your relationship leaving you with a heap of unresolved conflict. As one person is often avoidant of conflict the moment it occurs, while the other partner desires strongly to stick it out and attempt to work through the conflict no matter how heated the conversation gets.

 

It could be that actually, everything is okay within your relationship, but you are seeking to learn more about one another and steps to having a healthy and productive relationship due to upcoming wedding, birth of a new baby, or a life transition.

It may feel impossible now, but you can find the fun and love in your relationship again. You can build and repair trust. You can learn to communicate better and more vulnerably. And I can help you get there.

Therapy for relationships can help you…

Return to feeling connected by:

·      Feeling like you are on the same team

·      Enjoying the fun in your relationship again

·      Feeling secure, safe, and at ease

·      Being emotionally, physically, and sexually connected

 

Or for the first time enjoy:

·      Understanding how to engage with your partner to resolve conflict

·      Letting your guard down, and trusting your partner really understands you

·      Safe in knowing you can say whatever you need without fear or hesitation it will lead you back to your old patterns of unhealthy conflict and communication

·      A relationship that continues to grow, evolve, and become stronger no matter what situation you and your partner face

I help lead each couple through the process. By guiding the couple each step of the way based on the relationship’s unique needs and circumstances.

Much of my professional career has been learning to understand attachment styles, how they impact relationships, and how best to show couples its most often not a lack of incompatibility but a difference in connection through their attachment styles that cause most of their issues and conflict.

As a couple’s therapist I have:

·      worked with all forms of relationships from newly married, to 20 years plus marriages, all of which were seeking to find connection, safety, and understanding of one another.    

·      Used an approach to couples therapy that is motivated by the idea that it is not one person against another but the couple as one, in which I help my couples move away from blame shifting towards understanding the dynamics at play within the relationship that are causing the biggest issues. I do this by guiding them away from conflict avoidance towards conflict resolution, from withholding their feelings to openly sharing, and choosing to engage in a safe and mutually connected relationship.

·      Done this by using Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy, which is one of the highest effective therapy methods for couples while also incorporating methods from another success couple’s method known as the Gottman Method which helps those couples in distress.

 With the combination of these methods, I can assist your relationship by:

·      Identifying your attachment style, which helps define your needs and communication styles.

·      Explore patterns of conflict and learn to not avoid but lean towards the issue by using successful methods of communication that allow you to express your feelings towards one another without the entrapment of conflict, leaving you each feeling connected by enjoying being seen, heard, and loved

It’s time to reconnect with your partner.

Frequently asked questions about couples therapy

FAQs

  • Therapy for couples and relationships can look a number of different ways, and how we spend each individual session might look different.

    I have been trained in multiple couples-focused modalities (such as Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy) and pull from multiple approaches to meet your specific needs and goals.

    When we start out, we’ll meet all together in one session. Next, I’ll schedule an individual meeting with both of you, to get a more in-depth view on each person’s perception of the problem(s) in the relationship. We’ll then have the remainder of our sessions with everyone present together.

    Typically, it’s helpful to begin by meeting weekly so that the two of you can really feel some progress in your relationship. Often meeting at less frequent intervals can lead to slower therapeutic gains.

    We will always begin by forming a solid therapeutic relationship as I want you to feel safe in our connection and work. And I always encourage feedback about ways to make your experience better!

  • I’m excited about the opportunity to support you on your journey towards building a stronger, more connected relationship! We’ll start with a free 15 minute consultation so that we can meet and see how we connect.

    I truly believe the connection between therapist and clients makes all the difference in therapy, so if any of us decides we are not the best fit, I will be happy to provide you with referrals.

  • It really depends on what your needs and goals are. I’ve worked with a number of couples for a short period of time (6-10 sessions) or longer (15+ sessions). When there are more complex and painful pieces of your history as a couple (e.g., infidelity, domestic violence), it’s not uncommon to meet for 6 months to a year.

    Some people choose to meet with a couples therapist for an extended period of time to process multiple difficult events in the relationship or simply to have a safe space to come back to as needed for when they get stuck in another point of conflict.